Least manly ways of getting injured
cut self on daisy thimble on too tight jabbed eye with monocle underwear chafe reached too hard for the mayonnaise jar slipped in the tub hernia while on toilet
Some manly ways to get injured
skinny dipping with hammerhead sharks fighting a grizzly bear marathon lovemaking climbing mount everest Mixed Martial Arts Volunteer for someone shooting an apple off my head weight lifting war crime fighting prison shanking seppuku sword too dull motorcycle accident fighting a forest fire lion taming accident twelve-hour erection saving small children from a collapsing building…
This story’s about robots and ninjas
Story Idea About one million years from now, a race of robots exists on a planet. The story begins shortly after a virus has deleted much of the memory of the planet. A committee is formed to analyze the catastrophe, determine what empirical work needs to be done and create robots to fix it. One…
pixel:by the numbers
Age: 25. Money in Bank Account: $861.25. Amount in debt: >$7,000. Amount others owe me: >$1000. Yearly Income: $23,000-26,000. Rent: $700. Amount accumulating interest: $240. Books in personal library: 125. Books stolen from library counted in my library books: 58. Alcohol in my house: >$400. Height in centimeters: 178. Weight in kilograms: 82. BMI: 25.5. …
Some Improper Ways to Divide Medicine
Rather than the current specialty system, where people train on certain types of ailments, often localized to age range and body part, I can think of many other ways to subdivide medicine. Here are the worst: Alphabetically: “Oh, I can give you the Measles and Mumps shot, but I’m not really competent to mess with…
I’ll probably call it… Dr. Jamelico
1 oz Jameson’s Irish Whiskey 1 oz Frangelico 6 oz Dr. Pepper Mix cold and serve.
It’s ominous to Billy Bob Thorton
Fully Assembled Solid Wood Construction Carton Contains 2 Antique Chairs
I never met an honest man
“A crook can get in. A lock is for an honest man.” -Tim Harder, the guy installing my security system.
Seventeen Non-Negotiables
My friend Jack thinks that smoking is non-negotiable. Even if someone was the girl of his dreams in every other respect, if she smoked he wouldn’t be interested. I have quite other things that matter more to me: Has to be born a woman1 Has to presently identify as a woman Has to be trustworthy…
The idea behind writing down ideas.
Having independently originated the time travel device used in Primer,1 I thought I should write down all of my ideas here in case I eventually precede another blockbuster idea… you know: for bragging rights. So here’s this idea I’ve had for a while: A boy meets a girl. He doesn’t like her at first and…
Ironically, he didn't see it coming.