puntitleverse
His heart popped
She was drinking an orange soda, the woman of Eli’s dreams. It was the kind of Crush that hurt. Eli tried to stop her, but woke up instead.
His last meal
His last meal was a dish of raw sheep entrails that he hadn’t tasted in forty years. The dysentery got him before the gallows ever could.
He knew she was clairvoyant.
He knew she was clairvoyant. She knew he knew. She also knew that he was about to her out. She stopped him: “I just don’t see us together.”
Eli wrote stories
Eli wrote stories nobody read. Stories with no wizards or warriors. Instead they had boys & girls like him who were loved. Eli wrote fiction
Unforgivable Offenses
“I slept with your sister and she gave me AIDS.” She forgave him. “And I think zombies have jumped the shark.” This she could never forgive.
The moster’s sugar crash was unbelievable
Cookie M. was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes and told to limit cookies to a sometimes food. “But is some time all times!” He’s blind now.
Her heart was too big
Her heart was too big. She was so giving. She drove up to surprise me but never made it. She was an organ donor.. but her heart was too big.
The prank that was time insensitive
He waited for the test results for weeks until he realized his friend had changed his answering machine message to a dial tone. April Fools!
Love bites, undead love bites more
The last thing I wanted to do was tell her what happened. She would leave me…. But I knew it had to be done: “It bit me. I’m infected.”
Corina was gorgeous.
Corina was gorgeous. Nobody ever stayed mad at her. She made men miserable or ecstatic. Corina thought she was content. She couldn’t tell.
Ironically, he didn't see it coming.