cross-posted
Deep, like a llama
People are like… permanent markers: the more you shoplift, the more likely your pants are to get written on. socks: because you wear them on the inside of shoes. clouds: they float in the sky and look fluffy, but they can also look less… fluffy. monkeys: because we look like them. I think we’re related,…
Does your girlfriend know you’re making eye contact?
Coworker: I made my girlfriend a CD for Christmas about all the memories of the year. Pixel: *chortle* Coworker: Hey, at least I have someone. Do you have a girl to come home to every night? Pixel: No, but at least I don’t define myself by whether or not I’m in a relationship.
Ironically, he didn't see it coming.