February 2011
Unforgivable Offenses
“I slept with your sister and she gave me AIDS.” She forgave him. “And I think zombies have jumped the shark.” This she could never forgive.
The moster’s sugar crash was unbelievable
Cookie M. was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes and told to limit cookies to a sometimes food. “But is some time all times!” He’s blind now.
Her heart was too big
Her heart was too big. She was so giving. She drove up to surprise me but never made it. She was an organ donor.. but her heart was too big.
The prank that was time insensitive
He waited for the test results for weeks until he realized his friend had changed his answering machine message to a dial tone. April Fools!
Love bites, undead love bites more
The last thing I wanted to do was tell her what happened. She would leave me…. But I knew it had to be done: “It bit me. I’m infected.”
Corina was gorgeous.
Corina was gorgeous. Nobody ever stayed mad at her. She made men miserable or ecstatic. Corina thought she was content. She couldn’t tell.
Things Past Pxl was better at
Past versions of myself have been much better than me at quite a number of things. Some of these I want to get back to, others I’m ambivalent about. Here’s a nice list: Having a sense of purpose – and the happiness that came from coming close to that.1 Being funny2 The ladies3 Sobriety4 Sleep5…
Barfly
Ed ordered a PBR and sat at the bar being judgmental. The bartender left to check on the other patrons. Ed wondered why nobody liked him.
Some things take time, others lives
Wally was a comic, so for Hourly Comic Day he painted Trompe-l’œil every hour. His hand fell off at 9 a.m. He died from blood loss soon after.
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Ironically, he didn't see it coming.